Here’s a good one. So, I knew this nice looking lady (typical college look like a sorority girl at Rice University). Very shirt term affair, but at that time I liked those anyway. We went out a few times and she would always show up dressed as college girl with jeans and a nice shirt or sweater. Then I has lost ouch for a couple of months until a time when I emailed her and she responded. We went for dinner at Arturo’s and when I saw her I was like ‘wow, she is looking very different, very attractive and very corporate’. She was talking about her new job in marketing and was so excited about it. She mentioned that she had canceled her profile at a sugar site, and that she now did her own shopping and her own hair and nails without relying on sugar daddies. I was impressed because even though she was only 2 months older than the last time I saw her, she seemed like years away from the sorority girl I had first met. I kept smiling through dinner because I was happy for her. At the same time I was wondering what she was doing there with me. Clearly she had moved on to a different, better phase of her life. ‘Thanks for reaching out’. And then she revealed something very insightful. She said that because she is pretty, most guys don’t give her the time of day. They see the outside and then stereotype her, and basically walk away. Or just want her for a one night stand. I guess she liked the attention that older men gave her, with their extra confidence and more relaxed type of attitude. For example, I listened to her patiently and gave her my opinion about her work etc and I think she appreciated that. I didn’t just want to get in her pants. AND: she was such a narcissist though, it seemed, looking at her self in the mirror all the time and then turning around and smiling. The sugar baby wanted to be worshipped, and I did for a few evenings. She wasn’t very communicative so I didn’t pursue it further, heck, we had out fun and a few nice dates. What else could one want…
We all know that the sugar lifestyle is supposed to be NSA, clear limits are drawn due to the ‘arrangement’ aspect of this, we just have a bit of fun, and at some point in time in will be over. Most SDs and SBs can deal with this fact of life, it’s a given. Every now and then however we all meet someone who has us ‘enamored’, so to speak. We find ourselves saying ‘Wow that was a great date, can’t wait to see her/him again’. And each subsequent date is also very nice regardless of sex taking place or not. I found myself in that situation with this 23 year old once, planning every meeting and making sure I don’t screw up. It was short lived, it was during that time of my life when I was travelling almost every week. Using that situation as an example, I caught myself thinking about her at odd times, also wondering what her expectations were of me (besides the gifts, that is), I wanted to make a good impression. Was she thinking about me at all? Should I text more often and just say hello? I am not the type that invades people’s personal lives so I restrained myself. But did she expect more frequent communication? Should I let her know I was thinking of her? Her body language and behavior toward me seemed to welcome that but… I still hesitated. It would make me pensive, to think that it would be over soon. I would sigh at the fact that the limitations of the sugar lifestyle are always there, by definition. But what could I possibly do? Another SD long time ago said ‘It is the transitional nature of these relationships that makes it hard’. Indeed we are all on our way somewhere else. Somehow sugar makes it harder to even try and develop into something else. I did try, you know. How can a SD, being married, have a serious gf with an emotional relationship outside a marriage? Occasional fun is one thing. But being involved in a long term mutually caring relationship? That’s yet another level which for married people is just not very fair, or safe on so many levels. And it is frustrating…I have been so frustrated in the past, having met at least one special individual. What would I tell her?
And I just realized that I titled this ‘Some limitations of married sugar daddies’. Instead, I should have used ‘Some limitations of the sugar lifestyle’.
I have a hypothetical scenario for the SDs out there. Would you have an arrangement with a SB who was still a virgin (i.e sexually a virgin)?
Just something that crossed my mind: There is no more annoying thing than bad table manners, ok? Especially if someone is sitting at a nice restaurant across from someone chews with her mouth open and afterwards cleans her teeth with her fingers. I remember that one from way back when…I thought to myself ‘And I am supposed to kiss that? Nope’. No second date would be had I just rushed t finish my dinner and not waste anymore time there. Maybe I am not the classiest person on the planet but it’s my pet peeve when I see people with bad table manners. Is that too much?
I heard from an old old friend of mine, ‘Sam I am’ who we used to swap sugar stories with. I have known her for some time, and even though she lives in a foreign country we still keep in touch. She emailed me to announce that her daughter was accepted in a world class, very prestigious university. Congrats are due!! Just 1 or 2% get accepted in there so this was amazing, and it only goes to show what a great mother she is. She tried to give me a small part of the credit but it was all her and her daughter. As for the sugar lifestyle? She perhaps was intoxicated by it for a while (and who isn’t?) but she did it in order to provide a better lifestyle for the family, being a single mother. So good news for 2017, right?
Wasn’t there an old song that went like that? She asked the unbelievable ‘Let’s have a 3 some David. I will have one with you’. I declined the offer because I could feel something was up. And the person she offered to do it with…. Well…I just couldn’t do it so I didn’t even entertain that offer seriously. Given the fact our last one, she did not like in the least bit, I was surprised, no, stunned, that she would offer to do this. So this got me thinking: either she already had another one and now she is ok with the notion to do it again with me, or she was planing to have one and she just wanted to have the practice with me as the guinea pig. Why am I even mentioning this? I just like observing behavior, that’s all. I know all this may sound a bit strange to some readers, but when you have known someone and you are a perceptive person, you can pick up subtle hints, looks, or body language, and people tell you all kinds of things through non-verbal clues. It is interesting to observe. Of course I have been wrong before, but I’m just saying. You know… it’s like when you enter a bar that you have been going to for the past 10 years and you know everything and everyone. But then one day you walk in and suddenly there is one little thing out of place that just seems a bit off. You pick up that little hint and you exit the bar before the mobsters barge in guns a-blazing, 2 seconds later.