I met this blond who was around my age at the time, 40. Very confident looking but yet approachable and easy to talk to at the same time. She picked her favorite neighborhood pub to go to which was nice, casual and trendy. We sat at the counter, my favorite, ordered drink sand she also ordered dinner. I wasn’t hungry plus I had dinner waiting for me later on. As a side note, one of the bad side effects of sugaring is having to have 2 dinners (with a SB and at home too) resulting in some weight gain. Which I why I went to the gym 4 times a week! Anyways….The date went very well and we found a lot of things in common to talk about, especially real estate which is something she was starting to dabble in. She revealed that she had recently lost her job and staying with her mother which hurt her pride. I tried consoling he saying that ‘Well, that’s what family is for, no? To help out during hard times’. She wasn’t convinced though, and that was one of the reason she wanted a SD. Since this was just a first date as an exploratory meeting we didn’t really discuss details of gifts or whatever, we left that till the next meet up, or so I thought. I wasn’t sure I was going to proceed with this one, even though the date went well. I wasn’t 100% convinced there was great chemistry beyond just pleasantries. She made a request which caught me off guard. ‘David I was looking for $300 per meet can you give me the money now?’ To which I responded ‘But we haven’t even decided to enter an arrangement yet we are just here for 2 drinks’. ‘I need the money David, kinda hungry. Can you at least give me $80 so I can by food tonight?’ I did because I felt very bad. I was thinking that here we are in the most powerful country in the world, next to a very professional and well dressed and groomed looking blond, but yet she was unemployed and relying to random dudes to buy basic stuff. And she was hungry, which is why she ordered a large dinner and ate pretty fast. I became sad. It wasn’t the first time that I met SBs or potential SBs who had hunger issues. More than one told me ‘You know David this dinner is the first meal I have had all day long’. In one case it was a quick burger special at Shake Shack one evening before she headed home. Hunger stories affect me because I grew up with some crazy stories like that from my older relatives who lived through the Great Depression as kids and almost died of starvation….Unbelievable still. Makes you think what is behind every pretty blond you meet out there
Here’s a good one. So, I knew this nice looking lady (typical college look like a sorority girl at Rice University). Very shirt term affair, but at that time I liked those anyway. We went out a few times and she would always show up dressed as college girl with jeans and a nice shirt or sweater. Then I has lost ouch for a couple of months until a time when I emailed her and she responded. We went for dinner at Arturo’s and when I saw her I was like ‘wow, she is looking very different, very attractive and very corporate’. She was talking about her new job in marketing and was so excited about it. She mentioned that she had canceled her profile at a sugar site, and that she now did her own shopping and her own hair and nails without relying on sugar daddies. I was impressed because even though she was only 2 months older than the last time I saw her, she seemed like years away from the sorority girl I had first met. I kept smiling through dinner because I was happy for her. At the same time I was wondering what she was doing there with me. Clearly she had moved on to a different, better phase of her life. ‘Thanks for reaching out’. And then she revealed something very insightful. She said that because she is pretty, most guys don’t give her the time of day. They see the outside and then stereotype her, and basically walk away. Or just want her for a one night stand. I guess she liked the attention that older men gave her, with their extra confidence and more relaxed type of attitude. For example, I listened to her patiently and gave her my opinion about her work etc and I think she appreciated that. I didn’t just want to get in her pants. AND: she was such a narcissist though, it seemed, looking at her self in the mirror all the time and then turning around and smiling. The sugar baby wanted to be worshipped, and I did for a few evenings. She wasn’t very communicative so I didn’t pursue it further, heck, we had out fun and a few nice dates. What else could one want…
We all know that the sugar lifestyle is supposed to be NSA, clear limits are drawn due to the ‘arrangement’ aspect of this, we just have a bit of fun, and at some point in time in will be over. Most SDs and SBs can deal with this fact of life, it’s a given. Every now and then however we all meet someone who has us ‘enamored’, so to speak. We find ourselves saying ‘Wow that was a great date, can’t wait to see her/him again’. And each subsequent date is also very nice regardless of sex taking place or not. I found myself in that situation with this 23 year old once, planning every meeting and making sure I don’t screw up. It was short lived, it was during that time of my life when I was travelling almost every week. Using that situation as an example, I caught myself thinking about her at odd times, also wondering what her expectations were of me (besides the gifts, that is), I wanted to make a good impression. Was she thinking about me at all? Should I text more often and just say hello? I am not the type that invades people’s personal lives so I restrained myself. But did she expect more frequent communication? Should I let her know I was thinking of her? Her body language and behavior toward me seemed to welcome that but… I still hesitated. It would make me pensive, to think that it would be over soon. I would sigh at the fact that the limitations of the sugar lifestyle are always there, by definition. But what could I possibly do? Another SD long time ago said ‘It is the transitional nature of these relationships that makes it hard’. Indeed we are all on our way somewhere else. Somehow sugar makes it harder to even try and develop into something else. I did try, you know. How can a SD, being married, have a serious gf with an emotional relationship outside a marriage? Occasional fun is one thing. But being involved in a long term mutually caring relationship? That’s yet another level which for married people is just not very fair, or safe on so many levels. And it is frustrating…I have been so frustrated in the past, having met at least one special individual. What would I tell her?
And I just realized that I titled this ‘Some limitations of married sugar daddies’. Instead, I should have used ‘Some limitations of the sugar lifestyle’.
I have a hypothetical scenario for the SDs out there. Would you have an arrangement with a SB who was still a virgin (i.e sexually a virgin)?
Just something that crossed my mind: There is no more annoying thing than bad table manners, ok? Especially if someone is sitting at a nice restaurant across from someone chews with her mouth open and afterwards cleans her teeth with her fingers. I remember that one from way back when…I thought to myself ‘And I am supposed to kiss that? Nope’. No second date would be had I just rushed t finish my dinner and not waste anymore time there. Maybe I am not the classiest person on the planet but it’s my pet peeve when I see people with bad table manners. Is that too much?
I heard from an old old friend of mine, ‘Sam I am’ who we used to swap sugar stories with. I have known her for some time, and even though she lives in a foreign country we still keep in touch. She emailed me to announce that her daughter was accepted in a world class, very prestigious university. Congrats are due!! Just 1 or 2% get accepted in there so this was amazing, and it only goes to show what a great mother she is. She tried to give me a small part of the credit but it was all her and her daughter. As for the sugar lifestyle? She perhaps was intoxicated by it for a while (and who isn’t?) but she did it in order to provide a better lifestyle for the family, being a single mother. So good news for 2017, right?