Dangerous Liaisons was a book by a French guy from the 1700’s, Pierre de Laclos that was also turned into a John Malkovich movie some time ago. It was a comedy of sorts, whereby the main character and his female accomplice try to experience as much as possible, by ways of seduction and eroticism. In the process they met, had dinner/drinks/parties with a rather large array of people from all walks of life, personal backgrounds, and age groups. But it is much beyond just the sex and the seduction. The main characters also used these opportunities as a way to explore the limits of their rationalism. What I mean by that is that they tried to keep sexual pleasure apart from their emotions, at all costs. In their eyes the worst offense was to lose control of one’s emotions. In the end, however, they lost the battle to their emotions by causing someone to fall for them, and in turn they fell for it too.
I have to say that the book and the movie really remind me of what I experienced in sugar. It is something that is essentially NSA by definition, however at times there is this battle of keeping our emotions in check. And a couple of times they took over (especially once, did they ever!!). We meet someone that is intriguing and attractive at the same time, and over time something might click and then they enter our minds at unexpected times. Hence the battle of controlling ourselves, knowing that we are not 100% available to anyone and they are also not 100% available to us either. And that’s quite all right actually.
It’s this ‘struggle’ and this experimentation and the feeling of a wide range of emotions (lust, ‘like’, fear,even infatuation) that makes everything a worthwhile adventure, a departure from our mundane lives that are full or work, long hours, responsibilities to colleagues, clients etc. Don’t you agree?