Would you stay overnight with your sugar baby or your sugar daddy? And if you do, does that imply a higher level of intimacy? According to an old acquaintance of mine, Sarah, staying overnight just invites trouble because, as she said ‘You are holding someone in your arms while asleep’. Not everyone wants or is ready for this type of intimate setting. There are a few things to think about when you are considering an overnight stay (a ‘sleepover’ as I like to call them)
1. The first concern is your safety. While I don’t want to be an alarmist and I also believe that most people are harmless, you should think about your safety. After all, you may not know all you need to know about the man or woman you will be spending the night with. Women: do you have a backup plan in case you feel your safety is at stake? There can be separate blog posts about some basic safety techniques you can use. Men: are you convinced you can trust this girl or woman that will be in the same house or same hotel room as you? Are you sure she will not go through your stuff while you are sleeping and perhaps jeopardize your career or family life? Careful with her…
2. Are you comfortable with the closeness of the situation? In your own mind, will an overnight stay lead to a closer relationship? I think that depends on the person. After all, even in a one night stand type of situation you may go home with a guy and then leave the next morning and never talk again. I think most of us have done this at some point in our lives. You have to decide in your mind if this is a step to more intimacy. I have some personal examples and certainly some situations show up in my book as well.
One example is the person I flew down from New York to Houston for a weekend and she stayed at my place. I knew her from before and I trusted her. However, I never felt too comfortable having overnight guests, and it showed. So the whole experience was ok, it never lead to anything else more deep, and in fact I never saw her again as I was a bit turned off. Not because she did anything bad, but the whole closeness thing was too much for me.
The second example,, with Alex, was the opposite. I had been seeing her for a long time, so having a sleepover felt nice, and we had a great time together walking around the city. The fact that we spent the whole night together gave us the chance to learn even more about each other and it was great.
But hers was a special case. I bet most cases are not like that, so if you are considering an overnight sleepover, think about it first and what it may mean to you. If it means nothing then go ahead and do it. But if you decide that spending the night may lead to places you would rather don’t go, don’t do it.