I read someplace that intimacy with a younger woman is better than intimacy with a woman closer to our age. I have had both types but I really don’t know which is better (for the purpose of discussion, wife is excluded from the comparison). One thing I do know is that with an older woman, in general, you are getting a known quantity. You can relate easier to her and perhaps me and her have been through some of the same experiences, like the same music, see the world through the lense of a similar background and formative experience. We like her self confidence and we don’t feel like we need to show her the ropes. There are no ‘I am rolling my eyes because I can’t believe she just said that’ moments. In the past I have had several moments like these with women who were 20 years old, but its expected. Anyone of that age group is still finding themselves and discovering how they react and how they process what happens to them. A woman who is, say, 35 already knows all that and she doesn’t need my help to figure out or explain anything to her. I can actually have a grown up conversation with her.
With the younger one, at least based on my own personal encounters with them, I had to do a lot of explaining ‘Why cant you come out and see me right now?’ ‘Ummm, I am at work still?’ You know, silly stuff like that. Or I would be re-arranging my rather busy schedule to see the 20 year old and she would flake at the last minute (a pet peeve of mine!), without realizing I actually went through a lot of work to reshuffle things. I do have a busy lifestyle…
So then to the subject of intimacy, putting aside the little annoyances of a woman who is much younger. Thinking..I don’t know if its better than with a 35 year old, I just know its different. I am not just talking about the physical aspects of intimacy here. I am trying to think back what I felt when I was intimate with someone who was, say, 20. I felt excited to be with them, as it was a new experience for me. I also felt a bit self conscious like when walking around and getting strange looks from women closer to my age. Would people think I am a dirty old man? I swear I am not. Out of the many women I have been with, I can only count on the fingers of one hand those who were 19 to 22 years old. I also found that I tried being on my best behavior, as I didn’t want to turn them off on the whole of mankind by acting or saying something insensitive. Of course those that I found annoying I let them have it!
This is a long post, but I just can’t seem to describe my opinions about much younger women very effectively. It’s a tough subject to write about. At that age, some a narcissistic. Like that 21 year old Spanish girl that kept sending me selfies of her all made up in front of the bathroom mirror asking ‘How do I look, is this lipstick too red?’ right before she was going out with her entourage. Roll eyes, smile, and say ‘you look great don’t worry’.
Then with Alex, the intimacy on all levels was so intense that the age difference seemed to disappear. All relationships should be like that.