Romance and sugar arrangements

I was also asked about this topic too: i.e. is it appropriate to expect romance from an SD and whether romance had anything to do with my interactions with my SBs.

To generalize: no, the SB should not expect romance from an SD, that’s not what they are there for. They are generally there for fun and games. Maybe they are divorced or single looking for some action, or unhappy in their marriage and looking for something to spice up their life.  And the premises of the interaction between SDs and SBs is not a romantic one. It is friendship based, and it s of course possible to end up having a romantic relationship, but overall, romance is not what the SBs and SDs are looking for.  That being said there was one case where it started as sugar but then she and I decided we wanted to have a real relationship.  Like I say ‘I am not paying for an emotional relationship’.

In another case she started falling for it and could I feel it, and I think I could start feeling it too.  I did not mind. In the end though, she was uncomfortable with the whole thing as it was turning into something she was not anticipating and she moved on, fair and square.  Details are in my book ‘Sugar daddy Diary’

So if you are starting to have feelings for your sugar daddy or if he tells you he has feelings for you, its decision time.  Do you keep it as a pure friendship of convenience, or do you take the next step and have a relationship with an older (most times) man?  Here is the test: if it wasn’t for the allowance or the gifts, would you still see him?  If the answer is yes, then there is indeed something more there than just ‘sugar’



This entry was posted in Dating, mutually beneficial relationships, No strings attached relationships, NSA and tagged . Bookmark the permalink.

33 Responses to Romance and sugar arrangements

  1. As the old song goes, “I’m Through With Love, I’ll Never Fall Again.” No sugar relationship is better than what I have at home. It’s fun and games, nothing more. Friendship? Sure!

    • duh? says:

      if what you have at home is so great then why seek SBs?

      • Because monogamy is not in my blood. Although I love and adore my DW, sex with her is not enough. Therefore, I seek sugar. I’m completely aware of the fact that no woman in the sugar arena will ever compare to the love and respect I get from my DW.

  2. Ellen says:

    Id say one thing: a man has to pay either way.

    Let me explain:
    1. As a SD you pay for her time and company very generally speaking.
    2. As a partner you pay with your time.

    Time is always money you can look from diff. Perspectives: the person that has money but wants company, the person that has valuable company to offer, the person that considers time spent with another person more important than money that could be made in that time….

  3. well there is more guarantee that the partner that is the wife will stick around longer when things go south with the man, not very likely with the SB. it is not her long term goal to carry his cross when his life starts to crumble, that was not what she was paid for. so yes, he may be paying either way but the security remains with the first and primary partnership the marriage. I do not see her holding his hand when he gets a cancer diagnosis or the he is been investigated for fraud; much less visiting him as he awaits trial. or maybe I am just been unrealistic.

  4. That’s right Dr. The security does remain with the marriage, hopefully till death does us part

  5. Rae says:

    I like that the relationship is friendship based. I was wondering though, most Sugar baby and Sugar Daddy stories I’ve heard about always includes sex. My situation being, I would like to enter a arrangement one day but I wouldn’t have sex, purely because I want to be a virgin for when I marry. What are the chances a Sugar Daddy would be okay with no sex?

  6. SBMaxine says:

    “Here is the test: if it wasn’t for the allowance or the gifts, would you still see him?”

    I’ve asked myself that before as I was falling for one SD. Without prior discussion, our sugar relationship turned into a real relationship, fights and all. At that point, I knew we had “failed”.

  7. DownUnderSD says:

    I recently met a new SB, late twenties, average looking, girl next door kind of woman. From the moment we met I knew we ‘clicked’. But an hour into our ‘date’ I really started falling for her. Big time.
    I have now met her a second time, this time she stayed over :). We made passionate love 3 times, and in between we went out and did all kinds of fun things together. Since then we have spend hours talking on the phone.
    I will see her again in a couple of days, I just planned a dinner date, and I cannot wait to see her again.
    This was supposed to be a NSA relationship, but I have fallen for her big time… It is great but horrible at the same time. I don’t know if she likes me for me, or whether she is just great at making me believe she really likes me too.
    Its a weird and wonderful feeling. Time will tell what happens.

  8. @DownunderSD: Are you married, may I ask? If so, what are your expectations of having a relationship with an SB? I was in the same situation as you by the way. And you are right, time will tell if she wants you for you, or whether she is ‘acting’.
    I think its great though that you found someone with who you have great chemistry. That is the best outcome

  9. DownUnderSD says:

    @Sugar Daddy David
    No I am not married or otherwise engaged. I am divorced with kids.
    I have absolutely no idea what to expect. I will answer that question maybe in a couple of weeks.
    I feel a bit like a ‘teenager’ again. Never thought that would happen LOL
    The contrast between my business life and this sugar life is enormous. A 29 year old girl (woman) wraps me around her finger like a string of wool, and there is nothing I can do about it.
    I will keep my adventures posted.

  10. Dr.Isioma "issy" Ebegbodi says:

    downunderSD, nice of you to join david’s blog. it is entertaining, shocking and informative as you have noticed. My comments to your post; I do not even see your situation as a SD arrangement, for one, I believe SD/SB arrangements, the guy is usually married or engaged or commited with someone, you are single so this is a relationship or maybe FWB as you describe it to be NSA; it may evolve deeper but that is for time to reveal. I see you as an older guy with money and established to be able to take care of a woman regardless of how her age. What you describe is like a typical date, just that it moved quicker than other first time dates, so good for you to have found someone endearing and share a lot in common with. I hope it becomes the romance you seek and for her as well. Like others said time will tell if she is putting up and out to get something from you; but is that not the seem question we ask ourselves when we meet someone new the first time? is he or her for real?

  11. DownUnderSD says:

    I have asked myself that same question. Is what I am doing regular dating?
    Maybe it is, maybe it isn’t. I do not know the answer myself.
    Even though I am not married or otherwise engaged, I am not looking for a life partner, nor do I want to share my private, or business life with someone.
    With regular dating it is somewhat expected that you open up your private life to someone else.
    With Sugar it is different. You get all the benefits but not the emotional turmoil. And lets face it, at times it is just really nice to have a beautiful 20 year old in your bed… (The sex is usually crap with a 20 year old but who cares, it is hot and exciting for a few times anyway)
    btw, I am early forties and don’t consider myself old just yet.

    And yes Issy, I agree, David’s blog site is entertaining and informative. But I would not call it shocking. Surprising at times yes.

  12. Sex with a 20 year old can be an adventure, as she typically would have lots of energy and want to try and learn new things. I have found that what they may lack in experience they can make up for in training to suit our taste.

  13. @Rae: its possible to find a SD who doesn’t want sex, but I can tell you right now its hard, and you can only find it in a special situation. e.g. someone who just wants the companionship and perhaps is a bit older in age

  14. DownUnderSD says:

    ‘Sex with a 20 year old can be an adventure’.
    Yes I guess that is indeed the case. I never really looked at it that way…
    Maybe I will give that a go one day.

  15. hmm, david maybe you have been having really bad sex to conclude that sex with a 20 yr old is all that is great. i read that a lot from you. for me sex is better now i am in my 30’s than when i was younger even as a wife. i am more open minded, free spirited, not having kids anymore; not that i cannot have them if i want to but we are done with that, more expressive and assertive in my wants and needs which includes intimacy and physical desires; very educated as a medical doctor on the subject and without fear or embarrassment. training?? that is the weirdest thing i have heard; you have mentioned it a lot, if i was a man i would prefer to be with a woman who just enjoys sex from her core not someone i have to coach. someone i can enjoy her experience and share in them as a man if i was one not someone i have to teach, i thought that is why guys generally run away from virgins?
    sex and intimacy are like seasoned wine, gets better with age. on this one i agree with downunderSD.

  16. 40 is not old, i do stand corrected. you did not mention your age. look, just enjoy her and the time you share together.

  17. @Issy: I never mentioned that sex with a 20 year old is great. I said its an adventure.
    My preferred age is 27 to 32 and still is. That being said: there was this 20 year old girl with whom I formed the best connection ever. She was not experienced in sex. But I decided to spend time with her because of that connection, and in the same time sex evolved and some ‘training’ was provided that met my own specific tastes. Just like when I was 20 and slept with 30 and 40 year old women. They also showed me a couple of things I still remember.

    • duh? says:

      your specific standards kind of annoy me. I know that everyone is different and everyone has a right to choose what they’re attracted to and what they want in a relationship but sometimes your “standards” seem very anal retentive.

      your quote: ” My preferred age is 27 to 32 and still is”.

      I get 27 and I’m glad it isn’t 18 like most SD’s would say. but the 32 is what bothers me. why do you have a problem with older women? from what I know older women are still sexually active and know exactly what their doing and a lot of them are still into experimenting. so why discriminate?

      • Hey i am not discriminating, I also like 45 year old women, provided they take care of themselves, and provided they have not let themselves become nags

      • DownUnderSD says:

        I can understand David’s preferred age range of 27 to 32. I am not much different. Maybe for different reasons?
        That specific age group has been around the bends a few times and know what it is all about. They don’t giggle like the 20 year olds, yet still remain some of their innocence. By 27 most of them have learned what a man likes and what he doesn’t.
        So does a 40 year old off course. (they know very well what is enjoyable and what is so so). But, and I apologise to the ladies reading this, the body of a 40 year old is just not the same as that of a 30 year old. Its like an old car, everything works perfectly and purrs like a kitten but there is a bit of ‘slack’ noticeable everywhere, nothing is a tight anymore.
        The same goes for us guys as well off course. LOL, that is why we have to wave the dollar signs in front of the pretties…
        In conclusion, 27 to 32 year old woman are yummy.

        • Sorry you are no adonis, get over yourself and I mean that, apologies to SD david if that was too rude for his blog. It was too shallow of a response.

          • @Issy: No comment is too rude for my blog. Except of course for curse words which will be automatically deleted. BUT: how do you know he is no Adonis? Have you seen his pic?
            And I’d have to say that 27 to 32 is a good age group. At 27 I had the best times ever. I was experienced since I had moved out of momma’s place, had a career going, but still had youthful enthusiasm. Probably a lot same for females of that age group, no?

          • DownUnderSD says:

            Hello Issy,

            Did my comment offend you?

  18. Dr.Isioma" issy" Ebegbodi says:

    well the next man will train her, so what does she really like or want for herself in terms of her desires? that is my issue with the training part. it sounds so archaic like Victorian times. or maybe I am beyond my years.

  19. Listen up: Don’t think of ‘training’ as a school type of training. It is more like ‘ok she doesn’t have too much experience, but together we discover things we both like, and I show her some things she hadn’t thought about before. Some she liked some she didn’t but its all in the experience and discovery phase’ So that is what I meant by ‘training’. Think of it that way: Don’t we all ‘train’ each other to what we like or dislike, when we are part of long term relationship. She also trained me to certain things she liked, so we became very compatible with each other. We trained each other.

  20. Not a big deal. It is just the comprehension of words. It is how i interpreted what you said.

  21. DownUnderSD says:

    Bummer, it would be nice to do a school type training. It would put a whole new spin on ‘oral exam’.

  22. Actually…there IS a test, followed by a thorough physical examination

  23. ESD says:

    Hi David!
    Great Blog!
    We are a new Sugar Dating site for people looking for mutual beneficial relationships.
    Would love for you to check us out, hopefully sign up, and enjoy a great time on our luxury site, and hopefully find new matches!

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