Momma chicka

After the gym today I went to Joe’s Pizza on 16th street. Hilarious. Pizza after the gym! But why not, pizza is my favorite. Even for New York city this guy is pretty good and I like the fact he reminds me of those store keepers in the old country, you know, the ones that never have exact change to give you back but also whenever you are short a little bit they don’t care either. Colorful.  As I was having some slices, I was thinking that I will be pretty content no matter what. I have learned a lot of things and lived through a whole lot of things.  And I still have a lot of little stories to tell, mainly from Texas, just by the luck of the draw: Having spent a fair number of years there, some of them living by myself, I did some adventuring.

Like the story of ‘Momma Chicka’, an oldie but goldie….

I had pursued her a number of times but she was always a bit elusive. One time it was a theater rehearsal, another time it was working at an art auction as a consultant. One artsy bitch, you could say. So we got together once.  Then she went out of town on traveling to Israel. Then with her mother to China. Then to Germany on art business. WTF? Could NOT pin her down. Finally I gave up.  A few weeks later, she texted: ‘Hi Dave, want to come see my art show?’  I declined since it was far away on a Saturday and I didn’t feel like getting out of Houston on that hot day. Sticking by the pool was good enough for me.  But I did indicate that I could swing by her home town on that Friday.  Then, a day later, she fell and twisted her ankle real bad. I was getting the picture…it seemed like she had a cloud over her and whenever we were supposed to meet either travel plans or her health issues came in the way.  She even said so ‘Dave this was never meant to be’. I got pissed and said ‘Screw it!. I am coming over on Friday and that’s that’. She immediately said OK, and she would leave the door of her apartment open.  I was planning to take a day off work, so I was going to go on 610 against the rush hour traffic, so it shouldn’t be too bad.  Those folks who have lived there know that commute into Houston sucks big time, bumper to bumper.  I got there around 10 and pulled into her parking lot. What a huge apartment complex that was.  Where the hell was her place again. It was one of those complexes that has east wing, west wing, north, south, building A etc etc. I finally found it, came in, she was fast asleep, I took my socks off, browsed at her magazines. Mostly stuff on travel and recipe stuff (girlie girl), but I also saw Kiplingers so I zoomed into that one real quick. Then I said the hell with it, she isn’t waking up so I will crawl next to her.

A few minutes later she woke up finally, exchanged a few kisses, and during sex she called me ‘Momma Chika’ just like on the first time we ‘met’.  Weird: I am not Spanish, she wasn’t Spanish either, I am not her momma, and I am not chick either.  Interesting…  We used protection (latex) by the way. Why do I mention this? It will become clear later.

Anyways, we went to Arturo’s for a late lunch afterwards and it was actually quite relaxing under the shades, great service, not too many annoying lunch ladies at that time so it was a nice experience.  After that though I was thinking to myself: ‘OK so now that she told me her biological clock is ticking (she was 30’s), and me not being single what am I going to do with this one?’  A strange turn of events, totally unplanned solved the dilemma for me.  A few days later, I experienced pain while urinating.  We had used a latex condom, but I know I am not allergic to latex so it couldn’t be that.  Could it be something she gave me?  I texted her and asked her again if she is sure she didn’t have anything. She yelled at me through text and called me a jerk.  Not sure why, I am always very communicative so in this case I did the right thing by protecting myself, and also asking her.  I visited my doctor and ordered every test there is, A to Z.  I am paranoid and even scrutinize bumps I may have on my toe, even.  As it turned out it was a false alarm. The doctor explained with a serious face: ‘David, on many occasions when you get a new partner, her Ph level reacts differently and may cause some irritation on the penis until you get used to her’. Whatever, it was a false alarm thank God.  So I informed her that and also offering my apologies, but I had to ask.  ‘Good bye Dave’ was her reply.  No complaints here. Good bye momma chika


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3 Responses to Momma chicka

  1. Great to see you practiced safe sex, the condom lecture will do everyone some good. Needless to say, condoms do not protect for everything, HPV and Herpes included. Now with the talk of HPV tied to head and neck cancers, such as Michael Douglas’s recent interview and also was at a radiology/oncology conference I was present at in feb of this year, a patient who developed throat cancer with zero history of alcohol or tobacco use, it was debated at that conference the role HPV played in his cancer, patient is in his mid 40’s and it is terminal. Sad case.

  2. Dr.Isioma "issy" Ebegbodi says:

    Hey dave, good morning.
    Great questions. Well to begin with there are many strains of the HPV virus, the common ones associated with cancers are 16, 18 and 31; mostly for cervical cancers and 18 for head and neck cancers. With gardasil that was FDA approved for pre teens to 26 yrs of age for girls and boys this will prevent these virus from mutating to cancers but it is not 100% but it is preventative. So many debates have come up about whether vaccinating our children is immoral as we are giving them the keys to be promiscuous but i am a believer of preventative medicine. when i came to this country the vaccine was not out by the time it came out i had missed it by the age cuttoff; if not i would have taken it.
    1 in 4 adults will get HPV, but with a strong immune system it is usually cleared up but in some for whatever reason the strains mutate to form cancers or precancerous cells.
    For now there is no testing, the only testing we know of is pap smears, the ones women of reproductive age and having sexual relations do once every year to detect abnormal cervical cells that may be predisposed to cancer.
    The virus is transmitted sexually, semen, vaginal secretions, saliva and blood. It is asymptomatic in people, as people may be carrying the virus but have no symptoms since it is more on a cellular level. it is only symptomatic when it presents as warts in either a man or woman, which have a cauliflower like appearance, fleshy bumps, these strains do not lead to precancerous cells but are unslightly and of course will turn potential lovers away if it is seen. they are treated with cautery or burning off with chemicals similar to the ones since on the foot or fingers of adults or kids who thumb suck. these strains are 6 and 11.
    The head and neck cancers, with current research it is now 80% caused by HPV, the other 20% related to chronic alcohol and tobacco abuse or use but with many men smoking and drinking heavily it could be interrelated; biopsy will determine which cause and define the strain if it is HPV related as in Michael Douglas case.
    For symptoms, it is usually felt as a lump at the back of the throat or behind the tongue which interferes with swallowing, maybe hoarseness of voice.
    So i am happy we are having the conversation but this is now the new reality, there are always dental dams for men who perform oral sex on ladies but it is not used as it is not so popular. Unfortunately men will be at the receiving end so to say of cervical/vaginal fluids and with many random partners the risk of infection only goes up exponentially.
    Enjoy your day and Good morning

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