A question for SDs and SBs

I have a question fro sugar daddies and sugar babies, which will lead me to a future blog post:

‘Do you think your involvement in the sugar lifestyle has affected how you view regular relationships with the opposite sex? And if so, how? has it changed your behavior at all’

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10 Responses to A question for SDs and SBs

  1. Kali says:

    Yes it has. I now not only desire a more successful man. It has made me feel more confident that I can seek out and “keep up” with such a man. I’m black and before sugar I knew I was considered attractive to black men but, since white men rarely approached me I didn’t realize how much they were actually attracted to me. So I now look at them in a different light. I pay more attention to white guys now. But the biggest revelation from sugar dating has been about marital issues and why men cheat or why a married man would seek out a SB. I feel I have learned a lot that will help me hold my own marriage together.

  2. Of course it has! I expect my wife to be more sexually open and creative than she actually is, even though she has been having sex with the same guy for nearly 15 years. My outlook has changed in that I want there to be more spontaneity, more playfulness, and more “feel” of novelty than is practically possible.

    • True, spontaneity, fun and laughs make for great marriages ; the question what have you done to bring that in your marriage? It takes two to tango, so you have to do your part as well.

      • “Dr.,” before my marriage became essentially sexless, I initiated sex every time with my eye on giving my wife something in the process. Even in the lead up, I showed up like the cool, fun, loving dad that I am, which turned her on even more.

        As she has aged and is falling prey to her lack of stress coping skills, our sex life has deteriorated. I am only now getting back to the point of caring enough to fight to restore things to some level of enjoyment for both of us. Read my blog and you’ll know everything.

  3. Hmm, interesting but I call foul on your comments. To begin with I am a black lady like you so it is a sad day when you tell me a SD made you realize you had to find your self confidence. That is something you should have developed in your early teens. I now know to I have work to do with my little girls. I as a medical doctor, realized from the age of 7 I wanted to be one, watching my dad at work. So it is imperative all male relatives especially dads, play an integral role in the self development of their daughters so you do not have a situation where is waiting on some SD/boyfriend to do that for her.
    Second, you make me laugh, when you say, sugar life has preped you for marriage. You have it down like a Phd on how to hold your future marriage together. Having married for some years now, I have to tell you one is never prepared for marriage, it is like a gift wrapped nicely but then you do not know its contents, till it is open, more so human personality is like the weather it evolves and changes with situations. I know a lady friend who could even do the splits but her husband’s restless spirit just could not be calmed, he has to have his vanilla, chocolate and pstachio. It is how it is and she had no clue, so it tells you, you learn as you go. The other point is if you spend all the time in your marriage trying to hold that man down as you thought you learned, you will have him walking out of the door in no time and you with gray hairs to count.
    My advice is do your best as a spouse, giving all the support your partner will require of you, you take good care of your appearance, not so much for him but you as it is a confidence booster and if he is walking with you and men are staring, he knows he has a great catch, have a successful career, it provides you with financial and emotional security; should it go bust , have your own life, activities and friends, do not be up in his business all the time and leave the rest to God.

  4. On the issues of race in relationship, interracial relationships are of no big deal in europe, U.K and even Africa or Asia. It is more so here in the U.S. In the U.K or europe for instance, you will see more interracial relationships than you will see of same race relationships.
    What I think is the issue here more so with black women than other non american black women ; whether a white man is interested in her or not; is one socially black women here limit themselves, it may be part cultural, they have been told white men or even non white men foreign men are not interested in them due to the unfortunate matters of slavery very many years ago, secondly, it is educationally, not going to diverse colleges where they could have integrated with other groups. The last one is the self confidence issue, any woman who is self assured in her intelligence, personality and esteem will make a great catch to any man of any race, every man wants a complete woman that is a given.

  5. @Kali: how does sugar help keep a marriage together? Is it because having been a SB you would recognize the signs if you future husband got an SB himself?

  6. well david, i doubt that is what ms.kali was implying, if i am right her response was clear, she has been schooled on why men cheat and hence is better prepared to prevent that and hold her marriage together..that to me come off as magical thinking

  7. Ellen says:

    Even if I did taste only a half pinch of sugar, I think it proved me that if a man can and he wants he will do it. And it relaxed me towards any future relationship as I understood whats the difference between a man and a boy (in his 40 s, LA is a place of abundance for this particular type). So the difference to me is: a real man says what he does and does what he says and mostly do not lie to himself by prevailing on the possibilities money

    Ps.

  8. Ellen says:

    By the possibilities money may bring into their life.

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