I know this topic has come up several time on blogs, chat rooms etc etc. but I wanted to put some quick thoughts down anyway. There are two main concerns from a sugar baby standpoint: One is personal safety, and lots of advice has been written about that. The most obvious point is to have all reservations (round trip air and ground transportation plus hotel) booked to your name. Once those arrangements have been made, the sugar daddy should email the travel schedule. When the sugar baby has received the information she should call the airline and the hotel to ensure the reservations under her name really do exist. There is one good point worth mentioning. To make travel arrangements in your name, the sugar daddy will need your full legal name and your date of birth, otherwise he will not be able to book anything online. So it follows that if you are serious about meeting, you trust him enough already to give out that information. And then of course how do you obtain that trust? By talking on the phone several times before any agreement gets made you can develop a good gut feeling for the other person. What should you look for in a long distance conversation with a sugar daddy or a sugar baby? There is the disadvantage that you can’t see body language or facial expressions, so you can only rely on voice. Does the sugar daddy bring up sex during a phone conversation? (I almost never have, actually). That could be red flag as it means he is seeing you more as a traveling escort rather than a fun date or friend from out of town. I like to see these ladies as friends from out of town on a vacation and I am being the host. Anyway, I digress, but you get my point. The main point is that trust has to be established over the phone, quickly while the iron is hot, and before travel arrangements can happen. I recommend talking more than once, and these conversations have to be long enough to allow for substantive discussion to take place, and they should lead to getting to know each other quite well. In effect, these long distance phone calls and emails become the first date. So when and if you decide to finally meet, that would be the second date, only this time in person. Someone mentioned to me one time that there were no SD’s in the town where she lived, but she wouldn’t travel to meet anyone either. Fair enough, but don’t complain that you don’t have any SD then.
Anyways, so now that the trust has been built and travel arrangements have been made and verified and you have boarded that plane, then what happens. You arrive at the hotel, check in, they let you in (lol), you get two keys to the hotel room just in case, get ready and go downstairs to meet the other person for the first time. I find that is the most exciting moment actually. Walking toward the hotel lobby to meet the new friend from out of town. I smile with anticipation and start giggling uncontrollably. What happens if there is a let down either physically or chemistry-wise? What happens if in the first 10 seconds (that’s how long it takes to form a first impression!) you are thinking that this is not the man or woman you thought you were meeting and that there is no attraction? Well then at least you can follow through with a dinner or lunch and have a pleasant time anyway. It may not lead to intimacy but at least you can spend some time together and find some common things to talk about and pass the time. It’s not all bad.
On the subject of intimacy, the sugar baby will be asking herself: ‘Is he expecting something?’ In the words of a sugar baby I talked to a while back: ‘99.9% of all men would expect that to happen!’ She was correct: the sugar daddy would be expecting that and would be disappointed if it didn’t happen. after all he flew someone in for date! But if he is a gentleman he wouldn’t be too aggressive about it, and he should also understand that this is can be a stressful situation for the lady, and where a lot has to happen within a compressed 2-3 day time frame. It is better to let things flow naturally and if it happens it happens. If not, then well…at least we should all just try to make the be of it. If here is attraction good things can only happen If there isn’t we all learned from the experience.
That’s why I was saying earlier: many phone conversations have to happen before any traveling. Pay special attention to voice intonations, how people take things, jokes, any flirtations that may or may not be happening. You can tell a lot about personalities, and how in sync you are as people, when the physical proximity and body language of a personal discussion is not there. The only thing you have going for you is the mental connection. And for anything interesting to happen there must be some type of mental connection. So before you fly out (SB’s) and before you make any travel reservations for her (SD’s) pick up the phone and pay really close attention to the subtle hints of that voice on the other end. It will tell you a lot without even realizing it, if you are perceptive.
On the subject of ‘gifts’. The SB should outline what she wants but also be realistic. You expect flights, hotels, allowances, spa treatment, and also flying first class? You will get some but all of those, is my guess.
Let me know how it goes! I would love to hear traveling sugar stories from both SBs and SD’s.
I have some crazy stories in my book ‘Sugar Daddy Diary’