Traveling to meet your sugar daddy

I know this topic has come up several time on blogs, chat rooms etc etc. but I wanted to put some quick thoughts down anyway.  There are two main concerns from a sugar baby standpoint: One is personal safety, and lots of advice has been written about that.  The most obvious point is to have all reservations (round trip air and ground transportation plus hotel) booked to your name.  Once those arrangements have been made, the sugar daddy should email the travel schedule. When the sugar baby has received the information she should call the airline and the hotel to ensure the reservations under her name really do exist.  There is one good point worth mentioning.  To make travel arrangements in your name, the sugar daddy will need your full legal name and your date of birth, otherwise he will not be able to book anything online.  So it follows that if you are serious about meeting,  you trust him enough already to give out that information.  And then of course how do you obtain that trust? By talking on the phone several times before any agreement gets made you can develop a good gut feeling for the other person.  What should you look for in a long distance conversation with a sugar daddy or a sugar baby? There is the disadvantage that you can’t see body language or facial expressions, so you can only rely on voice.  Does the sugar daddy bring up sex during a phone conversation? (I almost never have, actually).  That could be red flag as it means he is seeing you more as a traveling escort rather than a fun date or friend from out of town.  I like to see these ladies as friends from out of town on a vacation and I am being the host. Anyway, I digress, but you get my point.  The main point is that trust has to be established over the phone, quickly while the iron is hot, and before travel arrangements can happen. I recommend talking more than once, and these conversations have to be long enough to allow for substantive discussion to take place, and they should lead to getting to know each other quite well.  In effect, these long distance phone calls and emails become the first date. So when and if you decide to finally meet, that would be the second date, only this time in person.   Someone mentioned to me one time that there were no SD’s in the town where she lived, but she wouldn’t travel to meet anyone either. Fair enough, but don’t complain that you don’t have any SD then.

Anyways, so now that the trust has been built and travel arrangements have been made and verified and you have boarded that plane, then what happens.  You arrive at the hotel, check in, they let you in (lol), you get two keys to the hotel room just in case, get ready and go downstairs to meet the other person for the first time.  I find that is the most exciting moment actually. Walking toward the hotel lobby to meet the new friend from out of town.  I smile with anticipation and start giggling uncontrollably.  What happens if there is a let down either physically or chemistry-wise?  What happens if in the first 10 seconds (that’s how long it takes to form a first impression!) you are thinking that this is not the man or woman you thought you were meeting and that there is no attraction? Well then at least you can follow through with  a dinner or lunch and have a pleasant time anyway.  It may not lead to intimacy but at least you can spend some time together and find some common things to talk about and pass the time. It’s not all bad.

On the subject of intimacy, the sugar baby will be asking herself: ‘Is he expecting something?’  In the words of a sugar baby I talked to a while back: ‘99.9% of all men would expect that to happen!’  She was correct: the sugar daddy would be expecting that and would be disappointed if it didn’t happen. after all he flew someone in for date! But if he is a gentleman he wouldn’t be too aggressive about it, and he should also understand that this is can be a stressful situation for the lady, and where a lot has to happen within a compressed 2-3 day time frame.  It is better to let things flow naturally and if it happens it happens. If not, then well…at least we should all just try to make the be of it. If here is attraction good things can only happen If there isn’t we all learned from the experience.

That’s why I was saying earlier: many phone conversations have to happen before any traveling.  Pay special attention to voice intonations, how people take things, jokes, any flirtations that may or may not be happening. You can tell a lot about personalities, and how in sync you are as people, when the physical proximity and body language of a personal discussion is not there.  The only thing you have going for you is the mental connection. And for anything interesting to happen there must be some type of mental connection.  So before you fly out (SB’s) and before you make any travel reservations for her (SD’s) pick up the phone and pay really close attention to the subtle hints of that voice on the other end. It will tell you a lot without even realizing it, if you are perceptive.

On the subject of ‘gifts’.  The SB should outline what she wants but also be realistic. You expect flights, hotels, allowances, spa treatment, and also flying first class? You will get some but all of those, is my guess.

Let me know how it goes! I would love to hear traveling sugar stories from both SBs and SD’s.

I have some crazy stories in my book ‘Sugar Daddy Diary’

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This entry was posted in Dating, mutually beneficial relationships, No strings attached relationships, NSA, sugar baby allowance, Sugar Daddy and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

16 Responses to Traveling to meet your sugar daddy

  1. Julie says:

    First time SB here! :) I found an awesome SD we live 3 time zones away so text throughout the day and always talk on the phone or Skype before bed. We are very attracted to each other and he is such a gentleman! He’s flying me out to meet him in a couple weeks and I feel completely safe about the situation..hotel room booked for me and everything. Im just wondering if it is a bad idea to have sex with him the first night. Because I want him so bad! Also is it unusual that there is no allowance? I’m not doing it for the money so it’s not a huge issue but I’m just wondering what I should expect from him instead. But my most important question is the sex. I really want to do him ASAP because he turns me on and we will only have a weekend together but I don’t want him to think I’m easy. Opinions? Thanks!!

  2. @Julie: my advice is simple. First of course you need to protect your own physical safety. If that aspect is covered and you have firm plans (including a backup plan) then just go with your heart. If it feels right, go for it. Just use protection, duh! If he flies you there, chances are he has flown others too.

  3. Syn says:

    Hi David,

    I found your article quite insightful. I remember when I met my (former) SD last year for the first time ever.He was from Norway and I from Kenya and we were both anxious about our first meeting but it went very well and we clicked immediately.Before I got to our destination, I made sure he had booked the flight and hotel in my name to avoid the issues you have mentioned here.Something every SB should do

    Syn

  4. @Syn: wow some international intrigue..Norway and Kenya. Yet so far away. How did u make it work? Do tell all the details please

  5. ChocolateAzucar says:

    Hey David, This will be my first time travelling out to meet an SD and I’m so excited for some strange reason! I’m praying everything goes well. He’s really handsome too! Call me lucky lol! Any new tips you may have to share?

  6. @Chocolate: Its good to be excited, travelling is an excitig thing especially when meeting someone new in a new place etc. Just make sure the excitement doesn’t cause you to do any misjudgements. For example, have you guys discussed all details and expectations in and out of bed. You don’t want to leave any lingering misunderstandings that you may regret later

  7. Stella Fox says:

    What if you met him person to start off with? I’m not sure if I’d call this man my SD but I guess it may fall into that category. I met him when I was holiday in the USA last year we met in LA and then he flew to Vegas to see me and now he wants to fly me back over to see him – He said he’d fly me over but stay in his house. I think I’d prefer a hotel just in the off chance we can’t stand each others company – Haha. What sort of questions should I be asking in this situation? In the time I spent with him it was comfortable I was quite happy to sit and eat breakfast while he did some business over email [I genuinely did not mind – It’s actually a good thing]

  8. Sunnyside Up says:

    Hi David,
    Your article was very insightful – I truly appreciate it. I guess I’m a first time SB because I am super nervous about meeting SD for the first time. We developed a connection via phone and texting. Our conversations are always intriguing, fun, and long. He wants to fly me out and stay at his place. We’ve discussed our connection and for what it’s worth. I have family and friends that live in or around the area so if staying at his place is too uncomfortable I can have an “escape plan”, right? I just don’t want to offend him. I did mention family and he said he could make arrangements for me to see them but we are in a time crunch and I don’t want to impose. I’ve never done this before and maybe this is a bit spontaneous so I’m afraid of my family and friends knowing the risk I’m taking, yet I feel like it would be a safety precaution to let someone know. Also, I’m not used to being taken care of and what not – so I question if this whole SD/SB thing for me? Or is just a mutual attraction of two people? We never established that kind of title (SB/SD) anyway. I also never had a connection/been attracted to man that was more than 5 or 6 years older (he’s 13 years older).

    Sorry for the ramble. I guess I’m just having mixed emotions but don’t want a good thing to go to waste.

    Best,
    S

  9. missmariaa says:

    S,
    Please tell me more about how that worked out for you. I am meeting a potential sd for the first time this weekend. He is flying me out to Vegas then were going to stay in this town where he is developing a resort. We’ve been talking on the phone as texting for at least a few weeks now so I feel comfortable but regarding the payment he wants to put me on a payroll for his company he’s give me a company debit but I’m just wondering if this sounds sketchy lol

    • Are you staying in the same room or different rooms? If this is your first time perhaps different rooms might be best, more privacy. As for SDs putting their SBs on the company payroll, I have heard of that before as well. I really don’t think its wise for an SD to do that, to close for comfort and it opens him up to blackmail. But if he chose to do so, well, then.. go ahead. Have you used the debit card?

  10. Adriii says:

    S, I am flying out to meet a potential SD for the first time but I am not 21. Is it possible for him to still book the hotel in my name? If not, how should I proceed concerning safety?

    • I thought that the min age for hotel booking was 18,no? Anyway if you decide to go and he books the room in his name, make sure you have a backup plan and enough cash to get out of there if things turn bad

  11. Bri21 says:

    Hi this potential sugar daddy who ive texted lately has sent my pictures of him and i had to figure out his name through an engine search but hes a doctor. Its just he hasnt asked to see me on skype or talk on the phone besides text. He says he isnt married and lives alone. Although hes nice to text i feel weird. He suggested i fly to miami to visit him well 1st he offered a job at one of his companies if i were to move there which i declined. He then said a date like 4 weeks. To which i responded idk i dont have any money right now. I am currently looking for a job which was the suggestion to work for him. So then i texted to see how he would respond. I said ill try to save some money and look up some flights. He responded Just do it and i will give you the money when u come.
    His texts are very half assed to be a doctor i feel but when he actaully tries his conversation seems convinving.
    He claims to have had 2 sugar babies before he put through school and a career.
    Im a little weary of him.

    • Hi Bri, I smell a bad outcome here. If an experienced SD doesn’t go out of his way to accommodate you on the first time you meet, and pay for your flight right away then I don’t know… If I were you I would keep looking. If you are weary of him, your woman’s instinct is probably right

  12. Dulce says:

    Lafies please help a potential sugar daddy says I should drive the hour to see him which is across state lines,I asked him for travel expenses he stated his rule is” no money up front until the first meeting” ,I did some investigation work his number comes clean as well as social media matches up but I feel it’s cheap he doesn’t pay up front any thoughts

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